Butterflies Are A Good Sign

I'm not 100% sure what's happened recently, but before the last couple of shows I've done I have felt surprisingly nervous. Jittery, excited, butterflies deep in my gut kind of nervous. What's weirder is that I kind of prefer it to feeling cool and collected before a show.

I like to feel as though I'm pushing myself beyond my comfort zone, and if I'm going into a show with an elevated heart rate that's gotta mean that I'm doing something right. If I feel a little scared to just get on stage, what's the difference between that and making a big, surprising and risky move in a scene? It's much better than going on stage and feeling fine and never getting to do anything out of the ordinary.

Tonight I'm going to do a show in an improv form that we've decided to call "Meat'n Three" and it's going to be absolutely absurd. The amount of freedom and room to play in the show tonight is very cool. We'll be doing some "meaty" scenes, some three line scenes, some nonsense, maybe some songs. Whatever comes up in whatever order. It sounds terrifying, but when I'm playing in it I feel as though I could handle anything that comes up. Because we're making this form up as we go, anything we do will fit perfectly into our show. No structure means no mistakes, and that's kind of awesome.

My stomach is flipping over and tying itself in knots right now, and I couldn't be more pleased about it. If butterflies are any indication, tonight's show should be incredible.